


Okay?

by its_me_smol_steve



Series: Let's Be Real [2]
Category: No Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 19:38:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18350351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_me_smol_steve/pseuds/its_me_smol_steve
Summary: Being okay is great, but sometimes it's not all it's cracked up to be.





	Okay?

Being okay is great, but sometimes it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

I was in class today and talking to someone who should have all their shit together.

Here’s a hint: They didn’t.

And I get it. Sometimes things happen. But it doesn’t involve me. I don’t care about what’s going on with your mother-in-law or your kids. I honestly don’t care. Not that I ever do, but today, I don’t have the mental capacity to care.

But you don’t care about that. Which means I get to be okay for you, then go study for an exam, then take the exam. I’m drained. But you don’t care about that.

So what do I do when I’m not okay, and when neither of the friends I’d usually go to aren’t okay, either?

That’s the part I’m still trying to figure out. I usually am okay. It’s usually a good day.

But when it’s not… who do I go to?

I know my friends would try to be okay for me. I don’t know how to tell them I don’t need them to be okay. I need them to not be okay with me. I don’t need them to be happy. I need them to be sad with me.

Tell me what’s going on with you. Just don’t expect help, because I won’t be able to. Just let me tell you what’s going on with me, and let’s be sad together. That would be enough.

Being okay is great, but sometimes it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

People expect you to be okay when you’re not because you usually are. They expect you to fake a smile and deal. But sometimes you can’t.

Sometimes… sometimes being okay is scary. It’s really scary. Because you don’t know who you are when you’re happy. You don’t recognize yourself. It’s okay. It’s just scary. Eventually you get so scared of being happy, you keep yourself sad.

And that can be dangerous.

So don’t be okay. That’s okay. Just don’t shy away from happiness. You deserve it. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Your thoughts and feelings are valid. They always are. That includes happiness, and that’s what we forget all too often.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone... so I'm not doing amazing today, obviously. Long story short, I had (have?) depression and repressed my feeling for literal years. I'm getting okay, but I'm not okay yet. I'm there most days, but some days/weeks aren't so great.
> 
> I've decided to make this series open to everyone. If you want to post something along the same lines as what I've posted, message me (probably by leaving a comment on this work or on "Spera") and I'll add you as a co-creator. Hope you guys are doing better than I am currently!


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